top of page
  • Writer's pictureBeth

Six weeks of self, week 1/6:The shadow

Available on Spotify ‘towhomitmayconcern’ if you'd rather listen to this message.

So, I realised how much I’d externalised my shadow. It’s me, the human-that creates the shadow, it’s always with me as long as the light is. It’s why dark nights of the soul make you feel empty, because it’s not that the shadow has overcome you, it’s that there is no light to contain it, it’s overwhelming and you have to go on a journey to ignite that inner light instead of seeking it externally.

The psychological theory of psychosynthesis puts forward the idea that when we are traumatised, we repress in two directions. Repressing the hurt itself to insulate the impact of the pain, and we repress the pet of ourselves that is hurt: the innocent, joyful, creative etc

When we work to create enough safety inside to be with our trauma and our pain, holding and

loving ourselves through it, creating a sense of

safety in spite of it, we expand our capacity to feel innocent, creative and joyful simultaneously. We free the parts of ourselves from hiding.

Dr. Assagioli, the founding father of Psychosynthesis psychology, stressed the importance of the human ‘impulse towards wholeness’ and the longing and striving for a more authentic experience of Self, and the unlimited potential in that feeling.

And as that conscious connection to Self becomes more integrated, the relationship inevitably extends beyond the personal to a sense of connection and responsibility too for the ‘greater whole’ – whether that is expressed in terms of the planet, our ecological footprint, community, our contribution to something of meaning or our interconnectedness with all things. This is often described as the awakening or ascension process, if you frequent spiritual content you’ll be familiar with the concept of universal oneness and the collective consciousness.

Quotes from: Leigh Ann Romano @psychicmediumwitch on Twitter

So I’m learning to acknowledge my shadow as a part of me, the me that needs to be seen and comforted not fixed or repressed. I’m not whole without my shadow, and just because it may contain the less pretty parts of my psyche, doesn’t mean I need to see it as less than.

I can release the baggage that wasn’t mine to carry anyways and accept the ink has dried on those pages in my book.

So, I’ve pulled 3 cards to summarise the goal of uniting with the shadow.

How do I validate my shadow?

10 of pentacles

Ground it into reality, accept what has happened.

Everything is a lesson if you want it to be, allow it to transform you but leave behind the things that cannot grow with you, the words spoken, the ideas and ways of thinking that weren’t yours to internalise.

Acknowledge that life has outgrown this situation, this behaviour, this mindset.

Get out of survival mode.

Dare to cross the boundaries fear tells you isn’t safe, transform into who you truly are not who you think you need to be.

However, don’t go soothing or sharing yourself blindly, allow the wisdom gained from the pain to keep you alert and aware of your boundaries and those people/situations who seek to exploit your soft points, wether their intentions are good or not.

“Only fear of letting go of a life and a stable but past situation could create problems, uncertainties and disagreements”

What is my shadow trying to teach me?

Queen of wands

You already have what you are seeking. You are already everything you think you’ve been missing, to become it is to believe it is to be it.

“ believe in yourself, that’s the place to starrrrt” Arthur theme song

You are safe. You know the best decisions to make for yourself. Your ideas are golden even if you’re the only one who understand them. Delusion is where the magic happens, it allows you to experience a reality that isn’t physical yet.

You are good enough and you have always been.

The lesson is to simplify your life, for example: you don’t need to spend money of a gym member ship or all these equipment to be commuted to your health, start with the basics, and as your commitment to self strengthens, the more you invest. Start with what you have, the self and let the material things find their way to you.

Focus on what’s in-front of you, stop watching to see how close you are to the peak of the mountain, trust and prepare for the next step.

How do I live in alignment with my shadow?

2 of cups.

Comfort yourself. Practice things that pour into you. Your shadow is not something to shun.

It’s not always about doing, on every path there are benches or points to rest, there are resting points built into the cycle of life. From plants to animals to the transition from night to day.

Allow the seeds you have sown to grow on their own, as you maintain them, gently. The same goes with your personal progress, you will be triggered again at points during your life, it does not mean you aren’t healed but maybe that there is still some old leaves that need to be trimmed for new growth to blossom in that space. Or maybe you need to accept that some parts will be sore and develop and routine to comfort yourself rather than beat yourself up for a natural human reaction.

When you feel pain, comfort it with love, tell yourself positive affirmations even if you don’t believe them in the moment. Listen to what your body needs, and you can’t hear it find a space of quiet and private, make space for it to be shown to you.

Lean into selfishness, the mind and the body should have a reciprocal relationship, acting in unison and alignment.

You live in alignment by understanding and accepting of all parts of yourself; this means the complete acceptance of the physical, emotional, spiritual, mental aspects in yourself. In essence it is loving yourself unconditionally.

Thank you for your attention,

I hope this message can serve yoh as a reminder in your time of need or affirmation in your current/past actions.



6 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Looking back to move forward

The only constant is change, when I let go of control over the direction and expectation of the path my life will follow, I put my trust in the universe to turn out the way I intend. I don’t think I e

005 - Goodbye, July

Giving myself time to rest at the beginning of the month, so I can actually process what I've lived is the biggest lifehack I've always avoided. I'm manifesting a life where rest is a prerequisite, ra


bottom of page